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April 29, 2006

Ph33r My 31337 R4ND0M F1\/3!

Then Gandalf the Gray and Gandalf the White, and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's Black Knight, and Benito Musselini, and the Blue Meanie, and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, the Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, Spock, the Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan, all came out of nowhere lightning fast and they kicked Chuck Norris in his cowboy ass.

Okay, so there's no karaoke tonight. Thus, you get your Random Ten early. But you also only get half of it.

1. One Headlight, The Wallflowers
2. Save Tonight, Eagle Eye Cherry
3. Glycerine, Bush
4. Down Under, Men at Work
5. When I Come Around, Greenday

April 29, 2006

Fixing the Internet's Shortcomings

I wanted to show this to someone the other day, and I quickly found that google could not find me a copy of it.

When the logo for the new Doctor Who series was first announced, there were a lot of complaints that it was "clearly" an attempt to capitalize on the Lord of the Rings franchise by making a logo that could not possibly be anything other than a rip-off of the eye of Sauron.

Doctor Who 2005 New Series Logo

Now, as it turned out, in context it looks almost nothing at all like the eye of Sauron, so the naysayers were wrong. All the same, I don't find this logo all that great, certainly not as good as the logo used by the 1996 TV Movie:

Doctor Who 1996 TV Movie Logo

But what seems to be very hard to locate on the internet is the newest Doctor Who logo. It was done by the Scifi channel, and only appears on their commerials. It's a shame, because check this out. It's a really cool logo.

Doctor Who Scifi Channel Logo

And now, it's on the internet for all to find

April 21, 2006

I am a sucker for the meme

So, normally I don't go in for the net.forward.memes, but my beloved thought this would be fun, and it was. Aside from the humiliation.

Here's how it works: Stick all the yummy digital music you have on shuffle, and repeatedly take the next song served to answer the following questions.

Obvious caveat applies: I haven't really updated my digital music collection in about five years. Damn you, RIAA.

  • How am I feeling today?
    • White Wedding, Billy Joel
  • Will I get far in life?
    • Drops of Jupiter, Train
  • How do my friends see me?
    • Wish You Were Here, Radiohead
  • Where will I get married?
    • All along the watchtower, Michael Hedges
  • What is my best friend's theme song?
    • The Remedy (I Won't Worry), Jason Mraz
  • What is the story of my life?
    • The Prayer of St. Francis, Sarah McLachlan
  • What is/was highschool like?
    • The Ballad of Ed's Shirt, Barenaked Ladies
  • How can I get ahead in life?
    • Bittersweet symphony, Barenaked Ladies
  • What is the best thing about me?
    • Peacekeeper, Fleetwood Mac
  • How is today going to be?
    • Kiss Me, Sixpence None The Richer
  • What is in store for this weekend?
    • When Doves Cry, Barenaked Ladies
  • What song describes my parents?
    • Fastest Man on the planet, Barenaked Ladies
  • What song describes my grandparents
    • Sleeping Satillite, Tasmin Archer
  • How is my life going?
    • Come Back Tomorrow, Quiddity
  • What song will they play at my funeral?
    • If I had a million dollars, Barenaked Ladies
  • How does the world see me?
    • Morning Glory, Oaisis
  • Will I have a happy life?
    • Black, Sarah McLachlan
  • What do my friends really think of me?
    • Captive, Sarah McLachlan
  • Do people secretly lust after me?
    • Silence, Sarah McLachlan
  • What should I do with my life?
    • Leave Virginia Alone, Rod Stewart
  • Will I ever have children?
    • i'm my own grandpa, Homer and Jethroe
  • What is some good advice?
    • Simple Man, Lynyrd Skynyrd
  • What is my signature dancing song?
    • You're No Good, Wild Orchid
  • What do I think my current theme song is?
    • I ain't marching anymore, Phil Ochs
  • What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
    • Lullabye, Shawn Mullins
  • What type of men/women do you like?
    • When she loved me, Sarah McLachlan

April 19, 2006

They like me, they really like me

The thing about dreams is that there seems to be a force in the normal human mind that doesn't want you remembering them. Even if you can keep your mind around it, because it's built by your subconscious, it often won't make any sense in the retelling.

All this is by way of justifying why I haven't posted any of them recently. But the streak ends for today.

Last night I had the most amazing dream. Even now, the details are starting to fall apart, and the trials of the day are starting to interfere, but the most basic feelings from the dream still persist.

I was expecting a few friends to stop by for something. Just two of three, and not for anything big, but I was scrambling around to get everything ready. At this point, I notice someone walking down the street toward my home. It's a friend of mine, but not one of the people I was expecting.

And then another. And another. Pretty soon the whole thing had evolved into the Power Walk from the end of an action show title sequence. I will point out that, with a couple of exceptions (My girlfriend, etc.), none of these people were actually people I know, though many of them seemed to be 'based on' people I know, and they all seemed familiar, with their own backstories and half-remembered shared histories.

And they filed into my home, forming a line (to what end, I'm not sure), and as I walked along this line, sharing my half-remembered reminisces about our shared histories in a scene not unlike that one from The Three Amigos, and the thing I remember most clearly, aside from the oddness that all these people from my (admittedly fictionalized) past would randomly decide to drop in on me at the same time, was the overwhelming sense that all these years, during which I had thought myself to be impoverished in friendships, I actually had accumulated all these dozens of people who thought of me as a friend and cared about me enough to stop by for a visit.

And that was really, really great.

There was more to the dream, a sort of Canterbury Tales-style series of shorts which I gather were the reminiscences of my past history with each guest (Okay, that kinda cheapens the dream to realize that I dreamed a clip show). One of them involved planting a surveilance bug on a gangster at a fancy restaurant, then escaping by leaping from the mezanine into a swiming pool below (the lead role in this sequence was played by that guy who plays Logan on Veronica Mars). Another involved a series of daring rescues of kidnapped psychics from the evil shadow-military-industrial-bad guys. The Noxema girl played the heroic psychic who scanned the mind of each captor for the code to unlock the captured psychic, I played the guy whose job it was to hold off the guards while she did this, and Michael Shanks played one of the captured psychics, who surprised us by using his godlike powers to paralyze all the bad guys during a key scene.

April 16, 2006

Inappropriate Thoughts 31: Sunday Easter Sunday

A few weeks ago, my girlfriend introduced me to Avenue Q. Avenue Q is a broadway musical based on a sort of thought experiment: what if Sesame Street was a real place, but you couldn't afford to live there? Basically, it's like Rent, but with muppets instead of AIDS.

But as I listened to the soundtrack from this play, a thought occurred to me:

I just wonder, sometime around the first time a muppet says "Fuck", How many children are rushed out of the theatre by scandalized parents who didn't bother to read the whole playbill?

April 16, 2006

Random Whatever

Lying here in the dark, I hear a siren's wail. Sombeody's going to emergency, somebody's going to jail.

1. If You Leave, Orchestral Maneuvers in the Dark
2. Champagne Supernova, Oaisis
3. When I Come Around, Greenday
4. Boulevard of Broken Dreams, Greenday
5. Down Under, Men At Work
6. 100 Years, Five For Fighting
7. Love is All Around, Wet Wet Wet
8. If I Had $1,000,000, Barenaked Ladies
9. Glycerine, Bush

April 09, 2006

Inappropriate Thoughts 30: Raising your SAT score

Today's IT is courtesy a buddy of mine who recently sent me a compilation of what were, purportedly, actual answers given on standardized tests. The others were merely funny. This one was outstanding.

IT30

In mathematics, we call this the "Waldo" method of calculation.

April 09, 2006

Random 010 (ask a geek)

They say that I have the best ass below fourteenth street.

1. The Sound of Silence, Simon & Garfunkle
2. Bubbletoes, Jack Johnson
3. Mr. Brightside, The Killers
4. One Night In Bangkok, Murray Head
5. Dead Ringer For Love, Meatloaf & Cher
6. Angel Eyes, Jeff Healy Band
7. She's Like The Wind, Patrick Swayze
8. Another Day In Paradise, Phil Collins

April 02, 2006

Inappropriate Thoughts 29: Don't Run With Scissors

Recently, I read this, about how a drunk driver avoided jail by claiming he was under the influence of Shania Twain. No, really.

Ladies and Gentlement, this is Shania Twain. If Shania Twain does not make sense, you must acquit.

April 02, 2006

Random Ten Returns

One part the fuerher, one part the pope, it's the inevitable return, baby, of the great white dope

1. Sex and Candy, Marcy Playground
2. Hook, Blues Traveller
3. Angel Eyes, Jeff Healy Band
4. Calling All Angels, Train
5. Another Night, Real McCoy
6. Champagne Supernova, Oasis
7. Brothers in Arms, Dire Straits
8. If I had $1000000, Barenaked Ladies
9. Stop Dragging My Heart Around, Stevie Nicks and Tom Petty
10. Joy To The World, Three Dog Night

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