And I Opened the First Seal...
Truly, we live in dark times.
Now, I've gone through periods in my life when I gave in to the addictive power of on-line bidding, sure. In fact, I'm composing this entry on a very spiffy touchscreen LCD monitor I bought on eBay.
But, folks, take your medication. This just ain't right. MSNBC is reporting that crazed fans are in a buying frenzy to purchase the used chewing gum of Britney Spears. I am not making this up.
You're probably going to hear me compare various things in our crazy, mixed-up modern world to signs of the apocalypse a lot (and yeah, maybe I shouldn't be so flippant about such things, given that lots of people really do believe that the end is nigh, and some high-placed folks are even actively trying to make it happen), but I'm seriously concerned about what this says for humanity.
Now, I'm jiggy with the desire to touch something connected to a famous person. I've got an autograph book (I haven't put anything in it in about eight years, but that's just because I so rarely meet anyone important). I can even understand slavish devotion to the Incredible Silicone Schoolgirl -- I don't care for the music or the look myself, but it's not like I'd flat out refuse an offer to try to produce some little computer geek-pop star hybrids (But then, I'm easy. However: sidebar...
Back when I was in school -- this was probably around '98 or '99, I spent an evening drinking with some guys who I don't remember that well now. I only recall the incident at all for two things. Hanging over their couch was a home-made page-a-day tear-off calendar, which counted down the days until Britney Spears became a Consenting Adult. I am not making this up.).
But folks, come on. It's used gum. Obviously, none of us are in a position to tell if it's legitimate -- but even if it is, it's still used gum. Let's be reasonable here. "FA: Chewing Gum (1 pc) Gently used - one careful owner." The basic grodiness of it really should put you clean off the idea. Please.
What's next? Southeby's selling off Shakira's used kleenex (Kleenex is a trademark of Kimberly-Clarke, nice folks who wouldn't even dream of suing little old me)? Even more vile things I will leave to your imagination.
(Oh, and the second thing I remember that night for? They had a full-sized Steinway. In their dorm room.) --------
Now, I've gone through periods in my life when I gave in to the addictive power of on-line bidding, sure. In fact, I'm composing this entry on a very spiffy touchscreen LCD monitor I bought on eBay.
But, folks, take your medication. This just ain't right. MSNBC is reporting that crazed fans are in a buying frenzy to purchase the used chewing gum of Britney Spears. I am not making this up.
You're probably going to hear me compare various things in our crazy, mixed-up modern world to signs of the apocalypse a lot (and yeah, maybe I shouldn't be so flippant about such things, given that lots of people really do believe that the end is nigh, and some high-placed folks are even actively trying to make it happen), but I'm seriously concerned about what this says for humanity.
Now, I'm jiggy with the desire to touch something connected to a famous person. I've got an autograph book (I haven't put anything in it in about eight years, but that's just because I so rarely meet anyone important). I can even understand slavish devotion to the Incredible Silicone Schoolgirl -- I don't care for the music or the look myself, but it's not like I'd flat out refuse an offer to try to produce some little computer geek-pop star hybrids (But then, I'm easy. However: sidebar...
Back when I was in school -- this was probably around '98 or '99, I spent an evening drinking with some guys who I don't remember that well now. I only recall the incident at all for two things. Hanging over their couch was a home-made page-a-day tear-off calendar, which counted down the days until Britney Spears became a Consenting Adult. I am not making this up.).
But folks, come on. It's used gum. Obviously, none of us are in a position to tell if it's legitimate -- but even if it is, it's still used gum. Let's be reasonable here. "FA: Chewing Gum (1 pc) Gently used - one careful owner." The basic grodiness of it really should put you clean off the idea. Please.
What's next? Southeby's selling off Shakira's used kleenex (Kleenex is a trademark of Kimberly-Clarke, nice folks who wouldn't even dream of suing little old me)? Even more vile things I will leave to your imagination.
(Oh, and the second thing I remember that night for? They had a full-sized Steinway. In their dorm room.) --------
